Bye Bye Herne Hill

So the flat is packed up into boxes and the fridge has been scrubbed. We were half-tempted to leave the place looking like the black hole of Calcutta, but I'm not sure what the black hole of Calcutta looks like. Except it's probably black. And hole-like.

We both feel a little sad to be leaving this flat because it has a lovely atmosphere... but we're twice as excited about moving into our new place. And staying there for at least a year!

This year, since being together (in February) we have lived in the following places:

1. Feb. Itchy Towers.

A hotel-cum-apartment-block in central London. The kind of place they put the long-term homeless. We lived there for 10 days, and named it Itchy Towers because, well, it made us itch. There was a mouse in the bathroom. Quite cute, but nevertheless...a mouse in the bathroom! Perhaps it was said mouse's fleas that caused the itchiness. In an attempt to stem the scratching, I went out and bought a new quilt. I got it at Argos on Tottenham Court road then went to meet my friend Helen for a drink in Soho. It must be one of the lowlights of my life, walking in to a pub carrying my quilt. It was the nearest to homeless I've ever felt. We drank cheap boxed wine every night. But we were happy because we were together.

2. Feb-March. Belsize Park.

After leaving Itchy Towers, we moved back to Buffy's old flat. The night we moved in, on a rainy February evening, we discovered that the previous occupant (her ex) had taken everything. Everything! Including the lightbulbs. The bedding, most of the furniture, half the patio heater... Most people think Belsize Park is posh, but there is an un-posh bit. This flat was in the un-posh bit. We had to find someone to rent it, so spent the next few weeks showing people round, hoping the Beast who lived upstairs wouldn't be singing along to her James Blunt records. We eventually offloaded it to a fuckwitted couple called Jim and Jose. Jim was a girl, in case you're wondering. We sold them the remains of our furniture for £20 and they repaid us by complaining to the landlord that we'd left it in a dirty state (we hadn't) and we had to pay for a proefessional cleaner. They're on my shit-list now.

3. March-April. Docklands.

We stayed in a friend's house while they went backpacking. It was a nice place but living in Docklands is like living on the moon. But with less life. The only entertainment was at the local Asda. It was a very good Asda. And the less said about the DLR the better.

4. April-September. Herne Hill.

You know about Herne Hill already.

And tomorrow we continue our great voyage around London by moving to Tulse Hill. You will, of course, be able to read all about it, right here and on Sara Sizzle (the best blog in the world).